About two or three years ago I figured out my hair actually looked decent if I wore it left down, as long as I used a diffuser on the hair dryer and finished it off with some Aveda Air Control hair spray. This was a great discovery for me, someone who had worn her hair pulled back in some form or fashion since high school, but it also meant I had to get a decent hair dryer.
I had been using the same Revlon dryer for probably 10 years, and it just wasn’t really cutting it anymore. It took forever to dry my hair, the diffuser was crap, and it was just… old. So I set out trying to find the perfect hair dryer for under $50.
After trying and returning one or two, I finally found one that I considered perfect: The Infiniti Nano Silver by Conair, a ceramic dryer that was $49.99—just within my budget.
This dryer is amazing. No matter the length of my hair it allows me to dry it in about 10 minutes, and the diffuser is the best I have ever encountered (and I have been around the diffuser block, my friends). It sends enough air through the diffuser so that my hair is dried without becoming limp (a problem often encountered with diffusers that don’t have vented fingers or enough holes in them), and it cuts down on the frizz that is the curse of the curly-haired. The length of the fingers also lets me add lift to my roots, which is a huge plus with my fine-but-not-thin hair.
I was in love. For about a year and a half. Then one day (in February 2009, if I remember correctly), the motor started making strange sputtering noises and I smelled smoke. I thought maybe it just overheated, but the next day it would barely blow any air at all.
I was heartbroken, but figured it was such a great dryer I would buy another one, hoping mine had just been defective.
That one was great, too, lasting almost another year, until the same thing happened in January of this year. Sputtering, refusing to blow air, smelling like something was burning on the inside.
Confused, I removed the back panel thinking maybe I just wasn’t cleaning the lint trap often enough. But nope, it was clean.
Now I was pissed. I emailed Conair explaining that one hair dryer going bad I could understand, but two was odd. I received an email back saying someone would contact me within three days to resolve the issue, but I never heard back.
I set out again to try to find a different dryer, one that hopefully wouldn’t crap out on me in a year’s time, but again I came up empty handed. It really all came down to the diffuser, and none that I found—even the ridiculously expensive ones I looked at—had the amazingly vented diffuser with the long, vented fingers I knew held the key to my hair’s success. So begrudgingly, I bought another one. Although this time I wised up and ordered it off Amazon, which at least meant I got the dryer for $40 instead of $50, with free shipping.
But still. It was MY THIRD GODDAMN HAIR DRYER in two years. I felt like a fool. Well, actually I felt like an addict.
So imagine how pissed off I was this weekend when, just a mere seven months after purchasing it, the thing shit the bed. Again. In the exact same way.
Am I doing it wrong? Is it possible that despite making it through life as a pretty intelligent person, you know, making mostly As in school, getting a bachelor’s degree after having been a double major—even completing some post-graduate work!—and possessing what I like to think is probably more common sense and problem-solving ability than the average bear… I have lost the ability to use a fucking hair dryer correctly?
Maybe using it on low heat for 10 minutes or less once a day is abuse. Maybe I’m supposed to sing some kind of hair-dryer hymn before I use it and then when I’m done, bathe it in the tears of children and set it to rest in a box made of solid gold that’s lined with only the finest French silk.
I guess we’ll find out. In a fit of anger Saturday I dashed off a complaint on Conair’s Facebook fan page, and yesterday I received a message from Susan Bloch in Conair customer service asking me to call her so that she can “assist [me] with my hair dryers.” Apparently she’s not in today, though, so I’ll have to wait until tomorrow to find out what her solution is.
In the meantime, like the goddamned punching bag that I am, I’ve ordered another Infiniti Nano Silver. It’s only $30 on Amazon now. Fingers crossed!